Kind of cold out there tonight, 15 F (9.4C) and the kale isn't looking so good. Kind of stiff and falling over. I broke off a bit and munched. Frozen, but surprisingly delicious. Delicately flavorful. Definitely edible.
Fluff is sick again. She's having trouble breathing and swallowing, and barely eats. I made her some rice; she likes that and she kept it down.
I think she might have masses in her neck, pressing on her trachea and esophagus. She has many soft tumors, and had one large one removed four or five years ago. She's almost 14.
I took her to the vet yesterday. The vet examined her and said there was nothing wrong. She did admit that Fluff's respiratory rate and effort were increased, but glared at me and said, "It's probably something like you 're wearing a new perfume and now your dog has asthma."
Yeah, I don't wear perfume.
Then the vet said, "She should have a chest x-ray."
"How much will that cost and what will it tell you?"
"$120, and if she has an enlarged heart," the vet said.
"An enlarged heart? You think it's congestive heart failure? Can you treat that?"
"Yes, there are medications. It could be heart failure. Does she cough a lot? That's a sign of heart failure."
"No, she doesn't cough. I'm going to have to think about an x-ray. I think I'll just take her home now."
So I did. She's having trouble breathing and swallowing, but she ate some rice. She sleeps a lot. I'm glad she's still here.
We've had some cold nights here in Maine. Down to 10F.
The kale lives. I planted a couple of rows last March and have been eating it since spring.
Today I picked an armload, solicited recipes on Facebook, and decided to roast. I poured a little olive oil in the bottom of a Dutch oven. That's an iron pot, lined with ceramic. I washed the kale, and cut it with my kitchen scissors, filling the pot. I added 4 big cloves of garlic, some chili pepper seasoning, and hot peppers. I baked it for half an hour at 350, and let it sit for an hour. It's perfect. Spicy and tender, green and red, flavor and nutrition.
thinking about wholeness, Reiki ethics, and autonomy.
How do you decide when your student is ready to progress to the next level? How does the student decide? What is the meaning of an attunement?
When a student is completely absorbed in self and craves attention, probably not the time to attune to the next level, right? But what if he/she demands it? Says, "You promised!" Cries, gets angry, threatens.
Why does this student want the attunement so badly? Is it a trophy? A badge of honor?
I keep getting that it's like Dorothy and Glinda... "You've always had the power."
I don't know why some students feel an attunement is so important when it seems to me that daily self-Reiki, adherence to the ethics, and sharing with others is way more important. hmm.
Is an attunement a celebration of what is or an opening to what will be?
is my favorite holiday.... all family, friends, and food.
My mom's cinnamon rolls, Uncle Roland loved her rolls. Our tiny turkey table decorations: Tom, Hen, and several smaller ones, chicks. Dad opening the oven door to baste the turkey and the delicious smell rolling out. Even after all these years of being a vegetarian, roasting turkey is one pleasant smell. It's home and Dad.
I remember my little cousins arriving after a long drive- all dressed up as Pilgrims. I guess we were the wild Indians. Native Americans.
We always had guests, too. Not just family. Random unconnected lost guests.
One year our guests brought eggplant parmesan. Every year after that Mother served it, and it was my substitute for turkey, my fab vegie indulgence. Oily, cheesy, smoky eggplant parmesan.
No cards, no gifts: just food. Food, family, and friends. Cold walks, sometimes snow. Pie.
The past few years I've gone to dinner with my dear friends Betsy and Dave. Their house is full of love, family, pets, and incredible homegrown homemade food. They are so gracious to allow me in, a random guest. I'm thankful for friends these days.
Teach a person to share Reiki. No guru here, no concentration of power- - it's free and accessible to all. Everyone can do Reiki, everyone can participate. That's why I love to teach. Spread it, share it, be it: Reiki.
I'm on a schedule. At work at 6: mentored students, negotiated with nurse managers, advised, & educated. Went to the office for several more hours of work: emails, syllabi, certificates, and online education servers. Life of a teacher.
But at 10 hours Fluffy needs to go outside.
So I gather my things: important papers, work for home, and personal belongings. I rush for the door. Oh, got to check in with the teacher in the next office. We get talking about student issues, "Sit down!" I sit down, we talk, eek, look at the clock, gotta go.
I think of a quick question for the controller next door. He wants to discuss. He has questions, "Sit down!" I sit down. I jump up to seek answers from the assistant registrar 2 doors down. I go back and forth with answers and more questions. eek, look at the time. He wants to talk about taxes. "Hey, I listened to you talk about Reiki. Now you get to listen to me talk about taxes."
It's just like the dentist. I can't seem to get away. Everyone wants to chat. I'm longing to leave, it's been 40 minutes now. I mention the dentist, how they didn't want me to leave. The controller says, "It's because you're so pleasant," so I razz him a little. He describes his foray into vegetarianism. "What?" I asked, "I didn't know you could be a Republican AND a vegetarian."
"Oh yeah," he replied. "I bought a vegetarian cookbook, but my wife wouldn't use it."
"So....you didn't do the cooking. You bought the cookbook for her."
"Well, yeah. I buy the groceries. She cooks for me."
Met a wonderful Reiki practitioner today. Young, fit, beautiful, enthusiastic... in life transition. She came to meet with me to see if she could volunteer at our cancer center. She would be wonderful, the clients would love her, but...
But she didn't realize how far we are from her home. It was an hour drive. On a snowy, slushy, rainy day. Lewiston is an old mill city. We are barely attractive in the best weather. Today was all gray and gloomy cityscapes. So it's too far for a weekly commitment to a volunteer position when one is an ordained chaplain and Reiki practitioner looking for a full time job with benefits.
I showed her our glorious cancer center, invited her to our monthly Reiki shares, and tried to talk her into giving a talk or moving here.
Did I mention it's too far, she's a single mom of a toddler, and she has never engaged in public speaking?
So it doesn't always work out the way you planned. OK. Things happen for a reason, and we don't always see the reason right away. Still, my spirit recognizes your spirit. Thank you.
I have dentalphobia and today was the day for a regular cleaning. Did Reiki on myself in the chair. Realized that I'm not as anxious as I used to be. Well, did have nightmares last night... whatever. Is is the kindness and compassion of my wonderful dental hygienist? Because she treats me like a real person?
Anyway, we got talking. Well, she did most of the talking when her hands and tools were in my mouth. I did manage to get in a few words about Reiki. Then the dentist came in and told me about her stress.
So somehow, after my appointment, I shared Reiki with the hygienist and the dentist. My Reiki path is a continual surprise.
Taught a Reiki class tonight. There were several powerful people there and one chatterbox. I tried to send fair and equal energy to all, but of course the chatterbox dominated my attention. She had lots of questions and wasn't sure she agreed with the idea of Reiki. She reminded me of my commitment to patience, acceptance, and tolerance. She listened to the history and ethics of Reiki, but declined to participate in self-Reiki, declined to be attuned, and unfortunately had to leave early.
The remaining students wanted to learn hand positions on others. They wanted to be attuned to Level 1. They burned with heat, energy, love, intention, and purpose. We shared group Reiki with a willing volunteer. We did attunements. There are new Level One Reiki practitioners in our world tonight. There is more Reiki light. There is more love.