Saturday, September 18, 2010

one very expensive space heater







It's turning into fall. My toes were chilly when I got out of the shower yesterday, so I bought a cheapo space heater from Wally World.

Got up early this morning to go to a wound conference in Brunswick. Stepped out of shower into delicious warmth. The light was on, the exhaust fan going, the heater... my toes were warm... then I plugged in the blow drier for my hair.

The house went dark and silent. Well, half the house, as it turned out.

I have no clue. I think I should go look at the metal box in the basement, the one about electricity. I do. I look. It looks fine to me. I'm half dressed, swearing, trying to figure out what to do, who to call.

I go online for clues. I type in "blown fuse". I read. Oh, I don't have fuses, I have circuits. I feel proud to have gotten this far. I read about blown circuits. It says to try flipping the Main. I run down and flip the Main. I hear the computer shut down. More half-dressed swearing. Still no power.

I text my son. He's an engineer. I don't want to call, it's 7 on a Saturday morning. I text: "blew circuit what 2 do?" He texts back right away. He's awake! "flip switches if doesn't work call electrician"

I run back down and study the metal box and the labels on the door. None say, "Bathroom." I flick switches. I run upstairs and try the bathroom lights. Nothing.

It wouldn't be so bad, except for the refrigerator. Half the house has lost power, including the refrigerator, which I've just stocked with vegies, eggs, and frozen pizza. I stress. I need to be on the road for my conference. I don't know what to do.

I grab my file of house stuff and find the electrician's phone number, call, and leave a message.

Suddenly I get an idea. I run back down cellar, grab my 100 foot extension cord, run back up, and start yanking the refrigerator from it's black tile recess. I plug into a working outlet and feel tremendous relief when I plug in the frig and hear it hum. I head to my conference.

At lunch time I tell my circuit woes to some other nurses. "Just flip all the switches," they tell me. "Oh, I just flicked some of them." I call the electrician to cancel his expensive weekend house call. Too late.

"You're all set," he tells me. "I flipped the switch and it's all good. I waited around for awhile to make sure."

"Oh," I groaned, "it's expensive, right?" I ask.

"Oh, I'll be easy on you," he chuckled.

The conference was great. I learned a lot and saw a lot of old friends.

Electricity? It was going to cost me, but I had power, and I'd learned something there too.

I drove straight home after the conference. Farm stands tempted me with pumpkins and mums, but I had to get home to let the dog out. Ten hours is about her limit and it would be ten.

Couldn't get the door open. The electrician had locked the knob, and I use the deadbolt. I was locked out. The dog was barking inside. I kept trying the key; it wouldn't work. I tried to break the knob: couldn't. I walked around the house and tried to figure out how to break in. Couldn't. Dog barking constantly now.

I walked down to my neighbor's house, the cop. "Hello! Nice to meet you. Could you please break into my house for me?"

He could and did; your friendly neighborhood cop is good that way. He took a hammer and a big screwdriver and dug the knob out of the door. How do I thank him? Clueless again. Any thoughts?

So now I have a hole where the doorknob used to be, owe the neighbor big time, and am expecting a hefty bill from the electrician. I think it's time for a glass of wine, don't you?